O Tannenbaum, O Tannenbaum, Wie treu sind deine Blatter!

O Tannenbaum, O Tannenbaum,
Wie true sind deine Blatter!
Du grunst nicht nur zur Sommerzeit,
Nein, auch in Winter, wenn est schneit.
O Tannenbaum, O Tannenbaum,
Wie treu sind deine Blatter!
*
*see English translation at the bottom

Christmas time is finally here, and after eight months of living on a non-operational Christmas Tree farm, it is finally time to harvest one of the wild trees from my backyard. I would like to give you a pictorial tour of the process:

This is what the tree looked like, growing in its natural habitat, grateful for the few years respite it was getting between the time the Christmas Tree farm closed three years ago until the day all this land is razed becomes McMansions. That is, until I came along with impliments of destruction:

Birmingham, ever handy with a saw cuts down the tree for me and poses with his kill on a balmy December afternoon:

Funny story about this one. Even though I tried to explain to Birmingham that the tree was only growing a few feet from my cottage, he insisted on driving his car up the hill to the tree to make the trip easier. As we were putting the tree into the car, a father and daughter rolled up on an ATV. They were trespassing in an illegal vehicle, but we were cutting down a tree on land that doesn’t technically belong to us. They justified themselves by telling us they’ve lived across the street their entire lives, and we justified ourselves by telling them we were paying rent and living on the farm. Once it was settled that neither of us was going to tell on each other, we made a thieves’ bargain to keep quiet:

Holiday Comedy Alert! It seems that either my eyes were bigger than my head, or I forgot that I’m no longer living in the pre-war apartment with the 10 foot ceilings. I’m living in the pre-Civil-war apartment with the 7 foot ceilings. Don’t put that saw away yet, Birmingham!:

It’s important to respect the natural beauty of the tree by piling as much crap as possible on to it. If you look real closely you’ll see many years of sheep ornaments from the Gray Boy, including the blinking light-up sheep lights:

Because the tree was so beautiful, I couldn’t bear to cut too much off the bottom. As a result, the angel at the top flies horizontal. If some myth about angels in horizontal flight doesn’t already exist, I’ll need to make one up for this tree:

Don’t you dig that angel? I’d love to tell you it’s some special family heirloom, but I got her at Kmart the year I graduated from college. I liberated her candlelights from a set of Halloween decorations:

Finally, my very favorite thing about Christmas on the Tannenbaum farm in the cottage is that the only logical place for the tree is the corner between the front door and the bathroom. I live alone and hence never close my bathroom door while I do my business, so I have this view of the tree from my toilet:

*O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree,
With faithful leaves unchanging;
Not only green in summer’s heat,
But also winter’s snow and slee,
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
With faithful leaf unchanging.

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6 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Dan on December 12, 2006 at 1:29 pm

    We decided to setup our tree Thanksgiving night. Unfortunately that required we completely rearrange the living room.

    Turkey + Moving furniture = Bad

  2. Posted by pagalina on December 12, 2006 at 2:27 pm

    oh i love me some sideways angel-action! that’s too funny!

  3. Posted by chachi on December 12, 2006 at 6:58 pm

    I haven’t even thought about the Christmas tree yet….well, that’s not entirely true it’s just the futon is too damn big for it to fit where I want it to go. Ah well, guess I’ll have to bask in other people’s trees till then.

  4. Posted by Flick on December 12, 2006 at 7:03 pm

    Sounds like you and I had a rather similar weekend…. getting christmas trees that were too tall for the room they were going in….and hitting our heads on things….. its like we were separated at birth or something!?!?..lol

    By the way…. the sheep lights were a nice touch!! 😉

  5. Posted by Vanessa on December 12, 2006 at 7:15 pm

    My my! That is a thing of beauty. I wish I could see my tree from the crapper. 🙂

  6. Posted by stefanie on December 17, 2006 at 4:52 pm

    I love the horizontal angel. Also, I live alone as well, so I totally understand the “not shutting the door while you do your business” part. I can see the TV from my toilet. Now tell me that isn’t classy.

    That was probably more than you needed to know, wasn’t it?

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