I’m free to do what I want any old time.

I’m a sucker for the suggestions of Aaron, so yeah, I changed my header to the charred sponge.  I might have taken a different angle on it had I known it was going to be so prominent, but that sponge is now busy biodegrading somewhere in the backyard that used to be pictured in my header.

Moving on… Do you know what was the coolest thing about being approved to drive on the first Monday of the month?  My inaugural legal drive (besides the one from the doctor’s office to work) was to the gym for Free Pizza Night!   And since the bastards wouldn’t give me back my membership dues for the two months I was out of commission, you better believe that I ate as much pizza as I could handle. By the way, that works out to be exactly three slices of pizza.

While there, I also requested that a car get towed.  Before breaking my ankle, I always wondered why there were even handicapped spaces at the gym.  Now, I get irate when I see non-tagged cars taking up the last parking places so that I have to walk further to get to the place where I then walk in place.  I don’t know if the towing happened or not.  But you better believe that after talking to the nice people at the front desk, I way over-exaggerated my limp as I walked to the treadmill (by way of the pizza) where I set out practice walking without a limp.  I’m just that dedicated to the rights of the handicapped.

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21 responses to this post.

  1. Everything about this post makes me love you more and more, Noelle. 🙂

    And your comment makes me feel that way for you.

  2. Way to fight for the rights of the gimpy!

    I’m there for them.

  3. Wow! I feel so honored. Like one man can make a difference. I shall carry this smugness with me into the voting booth today.

    Then I guess you’re voting for Romney.

  4. The sponge is awesome. I hope that when you see it, you have fond giggly memories of almost setting fire to your kitchen and not anything that makes you feel bad in this new year.

    What kind of gym has free pizza? I think that’s the kind of gym I need to belong to.

    Hooray for driving!

    Planet Fitness. And no, I’m not going to let something like a sponge get me down.

  5. Did they give you a handicapped tag when you broke your ankle? I always give people the benefit of the doubt – They could be driving a handicapped person somewhere.

    You’ll be pleased to know my son already knows about not parking in handicapped spots. He used to ask “Why can’t we park there?” when we would pass a vacant spot. I gave him a simplified answer. Now when we pass a vacant handicapped spot, he says “We can’t park there because we can walk.”

    They don’t GIVE you the tag, you have to get about 5 forms signed, and deliver them to the town police, and then it comes in the mail, just about the time you can walk normally again. If you are the driver of a handicapped person, you are eligible to get a tag. Otherwise, you should drop them off at the door and find regular parking. Like your son says, if you can walk, you should walk.

  6. That’s why I like going places with my mom. She gets the primo parking spots. So it’s true what they say about invalids: you can serve a purpose!

    Even if she goes to the mall?

  7. I love the sponge header!

    My friend’s dad used to refer to people with out a handicapped tag who were parked in handicapped parking as being mentally handicapped.

    It’s true, and it’s not the same.

  8. Yeah free pizza night! That’s exactly the way you want to restart your driving career. Personally, I am glad to have my car back so I can drive to the polls today.

    We both have our cars back at the same time! How lovely.

  9. Your gym offers free pizza night? That’s one way to ensure continued membership.

    Although it is in lieu of classes, trainers, spinning…

  10. Posted by EvilKate on January 8, 2008 at 1:34 pm

    Rock on with your handicapped self! I’m glad you spoke up. I mean if someone is just being lazy at the gym of all places, they should get their car towed!

    I am the avenger.

  11. i’m gonna try to stop dissing the handicapped for getting closer spaces.

    i’m happy to read you’re out and about in the world!

    There are so many people driving around with those tags, there is no way that all of them really need it.

  12. I never thought about handicapped parking spaces at the gym. At first glance they do seem to be pointless. But now I know they are not! Thanks for pointing out the error of my ways.

    I always though it was just a place for the pizza delivery guy to stop his car.

  13. I love this post and I love the new sponge-photo header.
    Hilarious!

    Thanks!

  14. Congrats on driving, again! That must be a fabulous feeling! And the sponge header is great!

    It’s a kind of spongy feeling, actually.

  15. I love the food revenge tactic. That’s so Las Vegas: I lost $500 but I’m going to enact my revenge by eating 3000 calories at the buffet.

    The sponge graphic is awesome.

    I love Vegas that way.

  16. Forgot to mention… at my former gym, the cardio equipment faced the big giant windows and so everyone who wasn’t glued to the TVs could watch the happenings in the big parking lot. And I would regularly watch members park in the handicapped spots and then run — yes RUN — to the front door of the gym. I got so annoyed.

    And there was also a woman who went to that gym daily who had cerebral palsy or some kind of ailment like that. She had very limited movement of her legs. I always marveled at her for going to the gym daily and it made me really appreciate how easy most of us have it by just being able to walk around the gym freely. I’m guessing you might appreciate that now too.

    Wow, thank goodness I have nothing as serious as Palsy. I think now I’m more worried that I’m not as attentive to others as I should be.

  17. I’m really annoyed by people who park in the handicapped spaces – especially since driving my nan around who has issues with walking, I can RARELY get a space. It’s sad.

    Some people act like they have to take the spot just because they have the tag. Ick.

  18. Posted by tinetastic on January 8, 2008 at 10:18 pm

    I can just about smell the charred remains of your dirty sponge. ..yumm!!! Have fun on your birthday. . .30 is not as bad as i thought it would be. . .then again I still live with my parents so who can trust what I say.

  19. Posted by gregorymeyer on January 9, 2008 at 12:29 am

    You’re never going to eat what you’re due in pizza. It’s a good idea, but the pizza model doesn’t lend itself to make up for any losses. I know. I’ve tried. Not pretty. At all.

  20. Posted by supersobe on January 9, 2008 at 8:49 am

    I like to park as far from the entrance as possible. It’s the only exercise I get.

  21. Posted by waicool on July 25, 2009 at 9:19 am

    the whole part about exaggerating your limp makes me wonder if you are an honest person or just a drama queen.

    I’m actually both. Put those two together, and that makes me sarcastic!

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