3.1 miles to glory

This coming Saturday, I’m running in a 5K race.  It starts on the West side of the Hudson River, crosses the Mid-Hudson bridge, and lands at the YMCA.  It’s my first race since breaking my ankle.  I didn’t want to do it alone, and since I didn’t think any of my kickball posse would be interested, I convinced Birmingham to do it.   I figured a little goal-setting would get him used to the idea of planning for the future.  You know, for the next girl who dates him.

“Now that I can run for 10 minutes on my bad ankle, I think I’m going to do the YMCA bridge run again this year.”

“Cool, I’ll watch again.”

“No, I want you to do it with me this year.”


“The first year, you watched because you weren’t ready, and the next year, you didn’t do it because I did it with someone else. But this year you have plenty of warning, and I don’t think anyone else is interested, so you have to do it.”

“Well what’s it for?”

“For the sake of it.”

“I mean, who gets the money?”

“It’s not for charity.”

“So why are we doing it?”

“For fun!”

“So why am I doing it?”

“Because you’re being punished.”

Should be a good time!  I might even gather up some old sweatshirts so we can throw them away, and I’ll encourage Birmingham to get water from the people on the sidelines.  It’s not every day that a random stranger just hands you a cup of water, after all.  And because I’m not all mean, I promised I’d buy him pancakes if he finished.  I might even pre-buy the pancakes and hold them out with a stick in front of him, but that just seems mean.  I’ll get right on it, then.


23 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by neuteronomy on May 1, 2008 at 11:03 am

    Punishment by running is abu ghraib-esque. Even for ex bfs.

  2. Ha! I love this. I picture you with a bag of things destined to go to Goodwill over your shoulder, tossing them as you run. Hope it doesn’t slow you down! 😉

    Oh…and make sure you “go before you go”.

  3. a goal for me for a long time has been to run a 5k. i think i need a friend like you to force me to do it : )

  4. I like saying “fun run”. Then again, I also giggle every time I walk by the “fireman phone” jack in Mara’s apartment building.

  5. You are good at punishing people. I am now scared. I hope I didn’t do anything to piss you off.

  6. Go Punisher, Go!

  7. Are you punishing him for Not Fucking Proposing Already?

    I’ve always hated the idea of “fixing” a boyfriend just so the next girlfriend could benefit from it. I do like the image of you dangling pancakes on a stick in front of him, though. 🙂

  8. It’s good to see that you’re so dedicated to his training for another woman.

  9. Yeah, I’m with MG, your dedication is impressive.

    I’m totally picturing people running just throwing clothes up in the air like confetti.

  10. You are impressive. I couldn’t run 3.1 miles if I wanted to, and I don’t have a bad ankle.

    Hooray for ex-BF punishment!

  11. How wonderful! And I don’t think the pancakes as a carrot would be so mean . . .

  12. Why won’t AS do a 5K with me? Do we have to break up first? Because I am totally willing to do that to get him to run a race with me.

    Good luck, you two!

  13. Punishment IS a good reason to do a 5k!

  14. I’d run if you held pancakes out in front of me!

  15. Pancakes would totally get my ass up to run a 5k.

  16. Well thank goodness I have no plans to go across the bridge this weekend. I fear with Birmingham running it could be closed for a while. You on the other hand would be across in a jiffy. Jeeze, who says “jiffy?”

  17. Pancakes aren’t that great. Waffles might do the trick, though.

  18. That may have been my weakest comment ever. Just not feeling it tonight.

  19. Go you and you bionic ankle! I’m so looking forward to running now that I have health insurance again. I cannot wait to read all about it!

  20. Posted by nancypearlwannabe on May 2, 2008 at 10:17 am

    Maybe he’d prefer being water boarded?

  21. Running would be a very effective punishment for me. I hope her learns his lesson, whatever that lesson need be.

    We had field day today at the kids’ school. I am tired just from WATCHING all of that running!


  22. Good luck with the run! I wish I could inflict that kind of punishment on someone!

  23. Running can be fun? Whaaaa?

    Hope everything went well with the run.

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