Remember me to the one who lives there

It’s official, on a hand-written lease, no less: I’ve signed on to live on the Christmas Tree farm for another year. The Landlesbian kindly only raised my rent $7 for utilities, and even though I’m still paying too much to save any real kind of money, it’s a good deal. I think she showed compassion in the hopes that I’ll share some beets from my garden. Provided my garden provides beets, that is.

After we did all that, I played in my garden for a little while to assure that those beets do arrive, and to take my new header photo (the above was like take 20 or something, I really, really need a new camera…) When I was done, I cleaned up my fingernails and some of the kickballers and I went across the river to have dinner at a Mexican place for a friend’s birthday. While over there, I got a voice mail from the Landlesbian.

Noelle, Noelle, this is {first name}, {first name} {last name}, your {landlesbian}. Darling, when we signed the lease this morning, we forgot. We forgot to collect this month’s rent. Would you be so kind as to leave it at the house on Monday? Thanks, dear. Yours truly, {first name} {last name}.

Oops. At least we both forgot, so she knows I’m not holding a protest over $7 or something.


24 responses to this post.

  1. Yay, the mini Christmas tree! It looks so happy, growing in the summer sun with its adopted brethren.

    Why do I picture your landlesbian as the evil boss in The Devil Wears Prada?

    She’s just not that put-together. But possibly that unreasonable.

  2. Did she actually say “yours truly”? I’ve always thought that was a closing used in print only…

    I can’t see your header picture. I’m assuming it is some sort of malfunction, and that it did not take you 20 tries to get a white box with a tiny red “x” in it… 🙂

    She leaves messages like she writes letters.

  3. I have never had a landlord call me “darling.” Unfortunately.

    Or possibly fortunately…

  4. I can see it!!!

    Sometimes it takes a while for new headers to load.

  5. Noelle, darling, that is hilarious. If you did decide to protest over the $7 increase, do you think she would cave?

    My rent is going up $20 on top of the $40 it went up last year. Time to move.

    No, she probably wouldn’t cave. I needed that collateral too make her fix the other problems.

  6. That is my favorite header to date.


  7. That is a fantabulous header. I love your plant markers. You could totally get an etsy shop going and make up your 7 bucks in no time. That really is good — my old place used to raise the rent 30 bucks a month every year. Ick.

    I have the best beet salad recipe. I’ll have to put it up once we get into beet season.

    It would be fun to have an Etsy shop!

  8. Posted by Deutlich on June 2, 2008 at 10:28 am

    ooooh, gardens make me happy!!

    Me too!

  9. Posted by lizgwiz on June 2, 2008 at 10:51 am

    Your garden is adorable.

    My landlord, on the rare occasions that he calls, always identifies himself as “Mike, your mean ol’ landlord.” (For the record, he’s never been anything but nice. I don’t know why he likes to call himself that. I guess he enjoys the irony.)

    Just what the world needs, an ironic landlord!

  10. A $7 rent raise??? That is awesome.

    Don’t you miss living in the city?

    Yeah, my old apartment would probably just be leaving rent stabilization…

  11. Posted by tinetastic on June 2, 2008 at 11:46 am

    I love the new header!


  12. i love your new header! : )

    when i signed my new lease they raised my rent $10. you got me by $3 bucks noelle!

    It’s ’cause you’re in the big city!

  13. I have never had a landlord call me “dear” OR “darling.” Maybe I should call my mortgage company just to check…

    I’m glad you are staying on the tree farm. You might lose too much excellent blog fodder if you leave!

    I wonder if your mortgage company takes requests.

  14. Only $7 increase is not bad!

    No, I’m prepared to be okay with that.

  15. 1) Love the new heading
    2) Love the title of this post – it doesn’t get much better than Simon & Garfunkel
    3) I will be so curious to hear about what you use your beets for. I don’t mind beets but I’m never sure what exactly to do with them beyond the beet salad
    4) I have never had a landlord that nice. You are lucky!

    I love beet juice. It goes well with so many other vegetables, and the greens are great if you sautée them.

  16. Posted by mjgolch on June 2, 2008 at 6:18 pm

    I like your new header.
    When I was a correction Officer we had a person who’s last name was Sage,Then we added a person who’s last name was Parsley,At that point now we need a Rosemary and a Tyme.As far as I know the lost two names are still missing.

    That would be a funny combo.

  17. That’s a rate hike I couldn’t complain about. I’m glad you’re staying for another year. If you moved, you’d either have to change the name of this blog or just throw authenticity out the window, and I like things just the way they are.

    If I ever move, at least I have that potted Christmas Tree to take with me.

  18. is not your $64 beet so worth it?! I mean, just LOOK at that header…

    just got the book from the library!

    It is worth it.

  19. Posted by Chatie on June 2, 2008 at 10:08 pm

    Such beautiful artwork I still remain quite impressed.

    Aw, shucks.

  20. love the new look!

    Thanks, I had fun doing it.

  21. Posted by mjgolch on June 3, 2008 at 12:19 am

    I like your New banner,I’ve made a few changes my self.Like fireing Blogger.I’m happy over at my new home.come for a visit when you have a chance/


  22. I should be finding out soon if my rent is going up. My lease runs out next month. And usually I just sign it because I hate moving.

    Yeah, in the end, a small increase is sometimes cheaper than moving.

  23. How nice to have such a friendly landlesbian!

    Your new design is adorable!

  24. Posted by sadieandleo on June 6, 2008 at 11:36 am

    Not enough people use the word “darling” anymore.

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