There is no pudding factory in Poughkeepsie

I better get back on my 30 activities: Hudson Valley project, because there seem to be some misconceptions about the place I now call home. After seeing Sex And the City with the gals at the Poughkeepsie Galleria last night, I was a bit horrified and amused that the town name got used as a verb, and in a not altogether pleasant way. It’s always fun being in a cinema when the location of the place is mentioned or seen in the movie. So when we heard “Poughkeepsie” mentioned twice last night, it got a huge reaction from the 75 women, 3 men and 1 boyfriend in the joint.

I’ve got nothing new to say about the movie that hasn’t already been said. I enjoyed it, although it did make me cry, not so much for what was happening on screen, but for how I related it to my life. Back in the day when I was living with in Manhattan, I all the DVD’s of the show. Seeing the film version made me miss living in the city. Not to compare myself or my actions to those four extremely unrealistic women, but even with all the flittiness of the movie, the emotions about broken relationships, friendships, and the happiness that love brings rang true.

I probably shouldn’t have seen the movie at a time when I’m sad about being single. This is also known as “PMS,” the three days of the month when any single thing suddenly becomes the saddest thing in the world. I hate that it happens that way, I do not like ceding control of my thoughts to my hormones, feeling that somehow my emotions aren’t real because they’re being controlled by an external force. And I get sad about the most ridiculous things. For instance:

Being sad that I have to drop $7.50 for 40 tampons? Acceptable. Being sad to the point of tears that the first security question on Flickr is “Where did you meet your spouse?” Unacceptable. Irrational.

But this too will pass. Beyond the hormonal roller-coaster, I often feel torn in two by loving living up here in the Hudson Valley, and the love I had for living in the city. It’s only 90 miles away, but when I can’t be both places at once, it might as well be 900 miles away. The city of the movie is a place that no one’s ever really inhabited, but underneath those pretty pictures, you can see the real place poke through, the lover I rejected, the relationship that I just can’t quit.

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22 responses to this post.

  1. i have this conflict between city/country, my decisions and change too. i love NH and that is where my family is. one of my closest friends is there. But i did not find complete happiness, love, nor my career path there; Boston has truly grounded me. Now I am split in two, a piece of me always lingering in NH even while knowing I need to be here, now.

    But life’s better knowing both places, I hope.

  2. The last paragraph was positively Carrie-esque. 🙂

    I must have accidentally channeled her or something!

  3. I disagree with Meghan. That last paragraph was way better than anything Carrie ever wrote. 🙂

    Aw, shucks. And also odd when you consider that used to be my name…

  4. Hang in there doll.

    Love the new header, by the way

    Thanks and thanks!

  5. I often feel torn in two by loving living up here in the Hudson Valley, and the love I had for living in the city. It’s only 90 miles away, but when I can’t be both places at once, it might as well be 900 miles away.

    I know that feeling all so well. Every time I go to Mass to visit the urge to move back becomes almost unbearable. I miss my hometown, I miss my grandmother. I want to be back in the place I know so well.

    But it’s not home anymore, central New Hampshire is. Mass is congested and clogged, filled with manicured lawns. No town in suburban Boston would allow me to have chickens and my cats would die of poisoning from the lawns. As much as I love my birth home town I love my chosen home town more.

    There are so many pluses and minuses to both, it is best to make do with where you are.

  6. Posted by Sarah on June 4, 2008 at 1:33 pm

    This post hits home for me– being newly single (which I’m not allowed to formally blog about until after this weekend, so consider this a sneak preview) and choosing to live in the burbs for the next year, even though life will be a lot slower and quieter out here than in the city.

    Oh man, I’m sorry to hear about that. I hated not being able to talk about my relationship until I formally announced its end.

  7. Posted by nancypearlwannabe on June 4, 2008 at 1:35 pm

    I love how relative this post is to so many people, on so many levels. I will re-read this one when I am weeping in the cereal aisle because they are out of Kashi.

    Oh, that would make me cry too!

  8. Posted by SisterAlyson on June 4, 2008 at 1:50 pm

    I saw the movie last night too and I totally thought of you with the Poughkeepsie references! P.S. If you Google “pudding” and “pougkeepsie” your blog is the first thing that comes up. So I guess there really isn’t a factory up by you. Too bad, b/c that was one of my favorite scenes in the movie.

    I’m so glad you told me that! That’s very cool.

  9. My sophomre year in college, the Arizona State Sun Devil football team went undefeated and went to the Rose Bowl. This was the same time Jerry Maguire came out. When Cuba yelled “I’m a Sun Devil Jerry!” the whole theatre ERUPTED in cheers. It was awesome.

    I feel ya on the being single thing and missing friends. That’s how I felt when I got home from my SF trip.

    I like that story!

  10. That’s sad but also beautiful. You kind of have two homes.

    I’m glad that scene in the movie got such a great reaction in “Poo”-keepsie. I laughed pretty hard myself.

    It was an enjoyable bawdy comedy moment.

  11. Sex and the City can make you nostalgic for New York, can’t it? Even though it is so unrealistic–and the characters aren’t always even that likable–it captures something about the city.

    It really does. It’s like the opposite of all those gritty city stories.

  12. I had the same feeling about missing the girls I used to watch the show with. It’s almost like you’re cheating on them when you see the movie with someone else.

    Yeah, it does a little. But this was more like starting the new relationship when you haven’t quite finished with the old one yet.

  13. Actually, I find that Flickr question really insensitive. I’d say that’s rational sadness. The cost of tampons, however, is beyond our control. Let it go.

    I’m not going to let it go until tampons are the cost equivalent of toilet paper.

  14. Posted by Chatie on June 4, 2008 at 7:41 pm

    Well I, for one, am incredibly glad you live here. Perhaps I could pookeepsie in my pants to brighten your mood? Ok, maybe not, but I’d be delighted to accompany you to the city any time or provide conversation and an ice cream sandwich at a moment’s notice. You’re so money and you don’t even know it.

    Thanks, lady! I like you too, and I don’t think that you need to shit your pants to make my day.

  15. good take on the movie. i enjoyed seeing it with a friend and going out after; but no sex in the suburbs.

    Well, no sex in this town, either.

  16. ahhhhhhh! i hate those three days. normally i’m a strong ass independent woman. those three days, a ball of mush.

    Yeah, it’s ridiculous, and works against all the things I’m for.

  17. Yes, I am a ball of mush when I have PMS too. Crying because I missed my exit. Crying because the guy on the PBS documentary about ants really loves ants. Crying because it’s Wednesday. It’s such a cruel joke really. Makes me want to cry.

    I don’t have a lot of friends nearby. They’ve all spread out all over the place, and I don’t live near where I grew up. It’s really hard. I miss them terribly. At 31, you can’t exactly go to the coffee shop and say, “Will you be my friend?”

    Yeah, there’s something about friends you’ve had forever that is more special than new friends.

  18. Fantastic post. As mentioned, the end was very Carrie-esque. I had moments of crying for my single-dom too. And I had the pleasure of seeing the movie with 3 gals who are all married or in long-term relationships. They just didn’t get it!

  19. hmmmm, you sound like a good candidate for a new life in san francisco. city, nature, expensive tampons, hot single nerdy guys – we got it all!

  20. Posted by Jess on June 5, 2008 at 6:56 pm

    I am so in that boat about being far away. 1200 miles is a bitch. Of course, they’re more of a bitch during those evil days where hormones take over. Blah!

  21. This is why I prefer movies like Ironman.

  22. I too was shocked. I saw the movie with someone who is not from NYC area. She could not appreciate the humor of the whole thing.

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